"The Wrong Side of Heaven And The Righteous Side of Hell" by Five Finger Death Punch

As has been detailed a great many times on this silly blog of mine, there's been a long time disconnect with new music. Sadly metal has taken the brunt of my choice to pull back. Far too many of the bands have stupid names or they didn't look metal.

Real metal bands have name like Dying Fetus! They also have long hair without dreadlocks.

Well, Five Finger Death Punch doesn't dress metal. They don't have a metal look. The singer looks like the dad from That 70's Show and the drummer looks like he aged out of The Outsiders. (Just thinking out loud, is that Chutulu trying to kill the bass player?) So this divergence from what is traditionally considered metal would make the music crap right? Well, it was certainly high time to find out. No idea what the deal with Vol. 1 and Vol. 2 of this record is. It surely doesn't seem like this is an overarching concept album that takes two volumes to finish...so someone fill me in here....

"Surgical Steel" by Carcass

Brutal mode: Engaged.Carcass has returned from the hell where they condemned themselves and I could not be happier.

Recently on Facebook, it was discussed how your friend and humble narrator got into death metal. During a Spanish II assignment in High School, my partner was a big death metal fan and he turned me onto it. Napalm Death, Carcass, Entombed, Obituary, etc.

Seeing the mighty Carcass return, brings warm feelings to my heart. Even if it's only really half of them. The original drummer, Ken Owen, had some pretty severe medical issues and could not participate in the reunion tours much less this new record. The classic Heartwork Lineup guitarist, Michael Arnott, later was a major part of Arch Enemy and did participate in the tours, but could not commit to the record and he went back to his main band taking drummer, Daniel Erlandsson with him.

"Temper Temper" by Bullet For My Valentine

These days the most music that is coming into my life is of the extreme metal variety. Reading Louder Than Hell will certainly do that though.

It's still absolutely ridiculous to separate all of the subgenres of metal though, but who are these guys? Everybody has at least heard their name.

This band is from Wales. Really? Who knew any metal came out of Wales? Though Wales's Henry's Funeral Shoe are also quite good, but not remotely metal. I suppose Wales is pretty brutal? Though Cardiff City FC can suck it.

"Temper Temper" is the fourth album released by these very angry Welshmen, but the name is still confusing. In this day and age, the metal fan has to accept that the vast majority of metal names have been taken and now the names are either not metal, or kind of out there and very long..... Well, this is my first go around with this band and let's see what there is to see.

Kiss Gets Into The Hall of Fame, a Commentary

I learned today that Kiss has made the Rock'n'Roll Hall of Fame! You may recall that Kiss is my favorite band. Quickly I'm running out of reasons to be offended by the Museum in Cleveland.

I've long been a fan of Kiss. I remember having a copy of Killers on import cassette (no idea why) at age 8. I remember seeing them take their makeup off and seeing "Lick It Up" for the first time.

I have purchased every one of their albums, most of them twice at least. I have Kissology 1, 2, and 3 on my shelf and I'm angry that 4 hasn't arrived yet. I have KISStory signed by the four original members. I dressed in Kiss make up for a show my band did. I have seen at least five Kiss tribute bands. I went to see Kiss in Ace's make up. Simply put, I'm a big, big fan of this band.

Now comes the awkward part...there have been about seventy five people in and out of Kiss, both officially and unofficially. Which of them should be inducted? I'm going to give you a run down on all of the replacement members starting with Mr. Eric Carr.

"Deceiver of the Gods" by Amon Amarth

Looking at this album cover it really does have everything. The  name of the band is strange. (NOTE: Upon a google search, this band named themselves after the Sindarin name of Mt. Doom. Nerds. 2nd Note: I was defeated in Lord of the Rings trivial pursuit, again.) The font is unusual. The heavens have parted and a man with giant horns is taking on a god in battle.

Seriously, this is Iron Maiden level cover art here.

Though this was my first experience hearing this band, they are a long time veteran band who bills themselves as a "melodic death metal" band. They hail from Tumba, Sweden. We all remember Nathan Explosion's Iowa and Scandanavia comparison right? OK good. Well, with their having recently played in town supported by a couple acts I enjoy, checking them out seem the only logical thing to do.

"True North" by Bad Religion

Punk Rock? Well, it has never really been pleasing to me. Recently an explanation was given to me by a friend: Punk rock isn't exactly music, but it's almost an art form unto itself. What?

As someone who's always fancied himself a bit of a musician that has always admired virtuoso players, it is nearly impossible to swallow this concept. That's not the only issue. Beyond the lack of musicianship, and often musicality, there is a very serious lack of originality in the genre, at least in the group that gets famous outside of their punk rock peers. Seriously, how many guys with rooster mohawks have you seen doing Sid Vicious's trademark sneer? It has to be at least a dozen off the top of your head.

So Bad Religion? I didn't know they were still a going concern, but I do recall an interview I read in Guitar World that they did nearly twenty years ago. Crazy isn't it? It is now time to delve into their latest release "True North."

Device's Self Titled Debut

Have you ever seen a video posted on facebook and your first thought is "Woah, this is so good! When is the album coming out?" This is what happened to me when the video for Device's cover of "Close My Eyes Forever" started making the rounds. Lzzy Hale plays Lita on that track and it is awesome.

Now comes the point where your friend and humble narrator has to admit to something. He had no clue that this was a side project of David Draiman. Who even knew that Disturbed was still a thing as late as 2011?

David wanted to do something more industrial, but still metal like NIN (?? His words, not mine) and Ministry and this is the end result.

There is an amazing cast of characters guesting on the record: Serj, Tom Morello, the aforementioned Lzzy Hale, Geezer Butler, M. Shadows, and the incomparable Glenn Hughes.) It's a veritable who's who of heavy music from the old, the new, and the middle school!

"Old Sock" by Eric Clapton

Eric Clapton is a musical legend, but he's not a legend that's been long held in high regard by this guy right here. For some reason I felt drawn to listen to this album. Many people, while respecting Mr. Clapton's contribution to the world of music over the past five decades, seem to think that the old man has lost his way and no longer has any music to express.

Personally speaking, his solo material, though the most voluminous, is the least interesting to me. Per this man's opinion, Clapton works best when he's the guitarist who's working with other musicians that bruise his ego which forces him to let loose the staggering player he keeps hidden, but let's move on to his latest, "Old Sock." The cover struck me upon first sight. It's frankly a bit horrible. The old man and his greying beard along with a terrible, terrible vacation hat.

"Seesaw" by Beth Hart & Joe Bonamassa

Here is the latest review of Joe Bonamassa's  work that has been covered here. (About three other albums have been missed in the interim as this man never, ever stops working for more than about 47 seconds at a time. He's like the James Franco of the music industry.) This would be the "sophomore" effort with this on again off again collaborator, Beth Hart.

Their first album left me, I don't want to say cold, but wanting. It was a bit hard to divine precisely what they were doing and why they were doing it together. Perhaps my listening was not as thorough as it could have been, but this review is now about "Don't Explain."

As silly as this is to say, Joe Bonamassa is one of my favorite modern guitar heroes. Yes, he's been around for about a dozen years now and has released more music in that time than anyone, save Buckethead, but that guy doesn't count in any normal way, and we've lost the plot.

"Welcome To Oblivion" by How To Destroy Angels

Sometimes it is time to take a chance. Picking out music recently and this showed up. "Welcome To Oblivion" by How To Destroy Angels.

Destroying Angels?! How inanely brutal must this record be? Even Morbid Angel and Slayer didn't talk about killing angels...maybe Cannibal Corpse.

It actually turns out that this album is not very brutal. In fact it's not even remotely brutal. It's not heavy and it's electronic music. Well, being a good sport, it was still given a go.

It would turn out that this is a side project of Trent Reznor's. Well, as NIN has always been like nails on a chalkboard to me, how bad could this be right?

"Ready To Die" by Iggy and the Stooges

This is basically my first listen to Iggy and the Stooges. Of course over the years the pop tunes by Iggy Pop have clogged my earways over the airwaves, and they were never very good at all.

It's very easy to forget that the man who gave us "Lust For Life" was once one of the scariest musicians in America. One look at his chest and the scars are evident, as they're real and self-inflicted on stage.

Nowadays, I'd think that most people under the age of thirty would think of Iggy like Riley did Ice Cube in the first Gangstalicious episode of the Boondocks ("That dude who does family movies? He was a gangsta rapper?").

One more pop-culture reference, Iggy Pop is a musical legend, but if I'd met him 2 weeks ago, I'd have to divert from that fact. Our meeting would be very much like Mitch Hedberg meeting Peter Frampton. Iggy Pop, do you like toast too?

"One Of Us Is The Killer" by The Dillinger Escape Plan

The Dillinger Escape Plan is a band that's been getting good press in the guitar magazines lately. During my subscription they have been the subject of at least three articles. Considering the amount of guitar work and guitar albums out there, that is certainly high praise indeed.

In the first article Guitar World described this band as "math metal," whatever that is. The guitar player was also posing holding a graphing calculator. Whatever all this meant, it sounded cool to this guy. There's never been any question about my nerdiness. The Geek Flag flies freely.

In the latest write up, the were compared to Animals As Leaders and Periphery as leaders of prog, not just prog metal, but modern prog. It was impossible to hear about this band and walk away without a desire to hear what their music was like.

"Let It Be" by The Replacements

The Replacements are a legendary band about which I know nothing. Recently a friend of mine mentioned that one of his guitars gets a good Paul Westerberg tone. I then thought really hard, lest I tell my friend I have no idea who this man is, and then I remembered reading an interview with Paul Westerberg in Guitar World when he was recording a solo record. It also seemed to me like Paul was an arrogant person with LSD (Lead Singer's Disease).

I've lost the plot already. Well, my five year mission is to explore strange new bands, but sometimes return to earth to fill up too. So, here we're looking at something that probably everybody in the world has heard but me.

I understand now that when I said 7 years ago I'd heard all the bands that needed to be heard, that my local radio stations were greatly remiss in introducing me to everybody who deserved an introduction. It's like when I found the book "Lies My History Teacher Told Me," except far less serious.

"Maiden England '88" by Iron Maiden

IRON MAIDEN! HORNS UP!

This summer they finally came back to St. Louis. Being an old man now, I went with my friend and his son, who's nearly as old as I was the last time I saw Maiden and older than I was the first time! This is relevant because Iron Maiden was recreating this 1988-89 Tour and played a nearly identical set list. There were a handful of songs that were different between the 2013 and 1998 versions.

Well, why are we looking at a 25 year old Iron Maiden live album? Because this is the 2013 re-release with extra tracks and presumably the reason why the Irons thought it would be a good idea to get back on the road and play all these songs again.  The show was spectacular in case you're wondering. Megadeth opened and played a great set and Dave didn't talk about any of the things that have made us all collectively groan....

"Outlaw Gentleman & Shady Ladies" by Volbeat

What the hell is Volbeat? Seriously, is there anybody who can tell me what the world Volbeat is trying to do here? It would be easy to say they're just trying to be awesome.

And they're succeeding at that quite handily.

About two years ago, their preceding album, "Above Heaven/Beyond Hell" made its way to me and the singer really seemed like something very special. No growls, no shrieks, just some sort of singing over metal. It gave me pangs of Dragonforce, but lacking the over the top shred and certainly lacking the Steve Perry-like vocals.

This was a band that aroused my interest in them and was bound and determined to finally understand what the hell it is they're doing. This the fourth album of theirs I have gotten and I honestly still do not get what they're going for, but at least they're still awesome.